The Pressure of Being Perfect

August 1, 2017

Before I even begin this blog post I want to apologise for the horrendously terrible photo that is along with this post. I have a love/hate relationship with this top, and I have an awfully bad habit of just not doing my hair ever. I really can't decide if I hate this photo, or if I'm just being critical of myself? I don't know but I'm using them anyway because I don't have to always get it right. 

Which brings me to the (kind of) point of this post. 

For the past few weeks I've sat down in front of my laptop screen, ready to write a blog post but the words don't seem to come out anymore. I start a post, and save it as a draft, and then I start another post and save that one as a draft too and I continue this cycle until I have numerous posts saved as drafts, but none actually worthy of publishing. It's annoying because I feel so motivated to write. I finally love my blog again, after hating it for almost a full year. After my rebrand, I was so excited and completely obsessed with sitting on my blog home page and just looking at it, something I've never done before. I always used to cringe at my blog and I would never ever read over posts because I was embarrassed by my own writing, but now I'm beyond happy with my blog layout, my content (the very little amount that I've done since my rebrand) and even my photos. So, why can't I write? 

I'm putting it down to pressure. I've finally got my motivation back, and I want so badly to write and create content. Every time I sit down to write there's a voice in my head telling me that it has to be perfect which forces me to overthink every word I write. My favourite posts I've ever written are the ones that I sit down and whack out, with little to no planning but, now I feel like I want everything I write to be 100% perfect and I'm over planning. I'm making lists and planning and planning and planning and when I finally sit down to write the post, the initial inspiration is gone and it feels like a chore. 

I never started out to be perfect. I just wanted to write and share ideas and do something that I loved. I know I'm not a fantastic writer and I don't have a massive influence over people, like some of my favourite bloggers have, and I need to remind myself that that doesn't matter. I like doing this, and anything that comes after that is just a bonus. 

I will eventually get around to finishing some of the blog posts I've drafted and I am really excited for you to read them, but for now I'm going to try to be more spontaneous and a little kinder to myself when it comes to blogging. 

Lots of love,
Aileen xo